Everything I wish I didn't know
"Hello, hello? hold on, hold on... I’m at a place called Vertigo."
He simply watched her as she spoke into the phone. She. She loved the city in the night. It was the lights, the high rises and the downtown from across the river, all made up of a million white lights. The intricate necklace of tiny red lights, as the cars zoomed in a file through the spaghetti intersections. The energy, the life force as the young tried their best to spend well the money they earned all day long... By having fun all night long. So naive, yet so happy. Ignorance is indeed bliss in this city of blinding lights
He had met her a few weeks back at one such place. Girl with crimson nails, Jesus round her neck, swinging to the music. Black hair and a black dress. Red black white and silver. She knew fashion. Turned out, she also wanted to know meaning. And though her soul couldn't be bought, her mind could wander. He made sure they would meet again. Of course he did, it was hard to resist his charm.
She found herself in the passenger seat of his black Jaguar, the night lights doing their work as he drove with the roof down. The long red line of tail lights flickered into the black void ahead. The headlights of the oncoming cars blazed pure white, making the luxury accessories on the dashboard dazzle in silvery brilliance. Black white red and silver. The burning lights in the black void. Reminded her of home. Speaking of which, there was something curious about him. He had this charm, a magnetism. Striking good looks, wealthy, sophisticated, obviously had taste... She looked into his eyes as he drove. They had this fire in them, intent, focused... and evil? Antichrist. She almost laughed at herself.
A hot young girl alone with a rich young shark. You know there’s really only one way this story can go. Turns out, it did not quite go that way. Was never going to. I lay there in that stopped elevator, almost dead, waiting for it all to end, simply watching her as she spoke into the phone. She was talking to her cousin apparently. Asking for a favor. Said she needed some help with this guy she had her eye on for some time. Somehow, you see everything in third person in that phase when you have let go and are just waiting to be shepherded. I was expecting the hooded dude to come over and escort me. I certainly did not deserve angles. Yet, none of them were anywhere to be seen.
A voice rang out from the emergency phone as soon as she put her cell away.
"What are you up to now, young lady?" It was terrible and powerful, yet elegant and learned. And somehow, I just knew who it was.
"Dad! What do you mean?"
"Why did you need to bother your Cousin? He has enough troubles with the ranks as it is."
"People need faith. And he rather likes it. At least this one will be worth it."
"I know he likes it. But every time you ask him, your Aunt gives me a hard time."
"Get over the sibling rivalry already. Its just work and you know that."
"Yeah, whatever. Anyways I need to go, discussing stuff with your Aunt. Love you dear, take care"
"Love you Dad, cya soon."
"... So whose turn was it to roll?...", I heard the voice die away as the elevator door opened.
He was handsome and elegant. What am I saying? Words fail to describe him. And then he spoke. With a heavenly voice and the beautiful middle eastern accent. I wish i could describe it. I wish I could tell you what he said. And he spoke to me. He showed me the creation. He showed me my own self. He showed me life. He taught me how to love, and how to kneel. And He told me I was healed.
She hugged him as he left. Great to see you she said. Lets get together sometime she said. He said it looked like it would be soon. And like stretched suspenders released, my conscious snapped back into the shell, overwhelmed and confused. It all felt so clear when it was free. Somehow now that it was back in, it felt all muddled and troubled. I'm at this place called Vertigo. It's everything I wish I didn't know.